Which intervention should a therapist start with for a high-conflict couple prone to flooding and using several of the Four Horsemen?

Focusing on the Four Horsemen and their antidotes is essential for a high-conflict couple prone to flooding. The Four Horsemen—criticism, defensiveness, contempt, and stonewalling—represent negative communication patterns that lead to relationship breakdown. By addressing these behaviors directly, the therapist helps the couple recognize how their interaction styles contribute to conflict and distress within the relationship.

The antidotes to each of the Four Horsemen provide a constructive framework for communication. For instance, replacing criticism with a focus on expressing needs and feelings fosters a more positive dynamic. By beginning with this intervention, the therapist sets the stage for more effective communication, allowing the couple to engage in healthier patterns and ultimately reducing the likelihood of flooding during disputes.

While other interventions, such as rituals for a time out, aftermath of a fight work through conflict resolution after a disagreement, and exploring dreams within conflict, are valuable in certain contexts, they may not directly address the most pressing issues of negative interaction that are evident in high-conflict situations. Therefore, starting with the Four Horsemen and their antidotes is a strategic first step in helping the couple transform their communication and mitigate conflict effectively.